Sometimes you just HAVE to laugh!

Ok let me make y’all laugh real quick. ( have y’all seen sex and the city the movie the 1st one, where charlotte poops her pants???)))

Ok so my day started off really good. Had a meeting, took care of some things at school, and when I left the school I went home to change so I could go to the dollar show and see prince of persia.

While I was home the mailman knocked at the door. Ian answered and took a certified package. It was my moms remains. 😦 That put a HUGE damper on my spirits, I cried in ians arms but eventually pulled it together to leave for the show.

Well this morning I ate cereal for breakfast, now I am lactose intolerant but I lovvvvvve cereal. Specifically captain crunch berries. So that’s what I ate. Ian and I had joked about me getting the bg’s in the meeting earlier and we had a great laugh. But I hadn’t thought anything more of it.

I get to the theater pay my dollar, purchase a coke and nachos and a hotdog. I was hungry since I hadn’t eaten since breakfast. Well half way through the hotdog. I feel my stomach flip. In my head I’m like oh lawd here we go. Usually the intolerance is more annoying than anything else. So I’m watching the movie (which is a great movie btw) and my stomach is gurgling. But the movie is very engaging. So I’m thinking ok ill just go to the bathroom after this scene.

Scene ends and I jump up and walk expeditiously out the theater into the lobby and rush across the lobby into the ladies bathroom.

Well by the time I make it into the bathroom my stomach is ROLLING and I’m literally dancing in circles trying to get my panties down and position myself to squat (divas NEVER sit) over the toilet.

So I get my panties all the way down and finally I have some relief stomach quiets down and all is right with the world….

UNTIL I LOOK DOWN

Lol apparently my panties were NOT completly in the clear before my ass exploded. LOL

They now reside in the lovely waste receptacle of the ladies restroom.

Its times like these that I’m S0 glad my momma always taught me to be prepared!!!

I did NOT have any more panties (but I go pantiless quite often, so it wasn’t a big deal). But I did have plenty napkins and hand sanitizer in my purse along with running water from the sink, so I was able to clean myself up! (Geaux me)

So my day went from HIGH (productive morning), LOW (receiving my moms ashes and wanting to just get in bed for a few days and cry it out) to LOWER (essentially pooping my panties), to HIGH(cracking the fuk up laughing while cleaning myself up and NOT giving in to the depression monster who was seriously nipping at my heels)

I mean really sometimes you just HAVE to laugh at yourself. Lol

So no matter what happened to you today, it could NOT have been worse than mine. Lol

And its okay to laugh… I sure did

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17 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. thoughtsofsoutherngal
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 15:12:23

    LMAO. LMAO. LMAO

    Reply

  2. Virginia J
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 16:18:06

    Gurl you have been through it today and came out unscathed. My had is off to you and by the way I thought that these things only happen to me glad to hear THEY DON’T. Let’s give a shout out to Charlotte for making POOPING YOUR PANTS FUNNY AS HELL.

    Reply

  3. LMichelle
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 18:30:38

    OMG. This is hilarious!! Girl you are a damn fool. But I know how you feel. I had such an occurrence almost happen to me one night after drinking cheap liquor and eating fried mushrooms….whew.

    Reply

  4. AR Gal
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 18:57:41

    Expeditiously…..bwahahahahahahahahahaha! This is hilarious!!!

    Reply

  5. Carolyn
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 19:08:18

    Only you would put this up on your blog so that we all could share the laugh with you! I’m glad that you were prepared though!

    Reply

  6. bayoucreole
    Aug 19, 2010 @ 19:56:07

    Girl, I got tears in my eyes reading this…this is too funny!

    Reply

  7. Cassandra
    Aug 20, 2010 @ 05:14:36

    ROFLMAO! OK dear! I was thinking this was a TMI kind of post but I’m glad you shared. It was a great laugh for me early in the morning.

    Stay away from the dairy products sister! LOL!

    Reply

  8. toni
    Aug 20, 2010 @ 08:06:34

    Girl, I learned my lesson the same way! Two words: Soy Milk!

    Reply

  9. Renee
    Aug 20, 2010 @ 09:30:42

    Too funny! I second the soy milk recommendation. It has saved my life (and my underpants).

    Reply

  10. sheila
    Aug 20, 2010 @ 09:52:33

    You have now messed up my dayumm mascara… laughing so hard. Have a Great Weekend.

    Reply

  11. DD
    Aug 20, 2010 @ 09:57:57

    GIRL. HILARIOUS!!! I had something similar happen to me a few years back but I was at McDonald’s with my two toddlers (ages 2 and 3) and thought I could wait and make it home. It was a hilarious and priceless moment!!! LMAO!! Glad it lifted your spirits!!

    Reply

  12. saule wright
    Aug 21, 2010 @ 13:47:01

    what up Patticake?!?!

    Reply

  13. Trish
    Aug 22, 2010 @ 07:12:55

    WHOA!!! I hate moments like that. I remember getting drunk once and needing to do a #1 and not making it to the bathroom but the liquor had me laugh it off, lol!

    Reply

  14. Netta Boo
    Aug 22, 2010 @ 16:06:50

    FUNNY, FUNNY, FUNNY. I love your new layout and try vanilla almond milk or Lactaid.

    Reply

  15. Keli
    Aug 25, 2010 @ 19:28:57

    Yes ma’am… sometimes you just have to just laugh at yourself… I always say, “I laugh to keep from crying.” Not to mention, laughter is good for the soul.

    Oh… I use almond milk, but not vanilla… it’s like drinking a watery milk shake… try the original (Blue Diamond)… just the right about of sweetness.

    Reply

  16. Ms. Behaving
    Aug 26, 2010 @ 15:18:10

    LMAOOOOOOOOO!

    Thank GOD I am NOT lactose intolerant…AND that this incident was able to lift your spirits. 😉

    Reply

  17. Nik
    Aug 30, 2010 @ 11:39:31

    Girl. Girl. I laughed at “expeditiously”. You pulled out the “ten dollar words”.

    As child, I made a mistake and shit on myself. My brothers were purposefully farting at the table while eating dinner, and I wanted to join in. I let out my fart and “sharted” on myself (combination SHit and fARTED.).

    You reminded me of this story. I was trying to forget it.

    Reply

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